ads

Morpheus: Unfortunately, no one can be told what the gf is. You have to feel it for yourself.

File: 1345254784425.jpg-(19 KB, 320x291, matrix-red-dress[1].jpg)

Planet Fitness is a system, Anon. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around, what do you see? Curlbros, cardiobunnies, land whales, Nat King Swole. The very minds of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to step into the squat rack. And many of them are so inured, so hopelessly dependent on Planet Fitness, that they will fight to protect it.
>Were you listening to me, Anon? Or were you looking at the cardiobunny in the yoga pants?

>>14212818
>>14213011

paininsides/10

Morpheus: We don't know who struck first, us or them. But we do know it was us who lifted heavy. At the time, they were dependent on bad form and muscle confusion. It was believed they would be unable to survive without a snap-city source as abundant as Crossfit.

>Morpheus: Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to lift. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.

Anybody who actually lifts: Do not try and squat the bar. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.
Fat aspie neckbeard: What truth?
Anybody who actually lifts: Starting Strength is a troll.
Fat aspie neckbeard: Starting Strength is a troll?
Anybody who actually lifts: Then you'll see, that it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself.

>>14213201
i lol'd

HamplaNeo: Why do my muscles hurt?
>Scoobpheus: You've never used them before.

File: 1345257531412.jpg-(86 KB, 414x472, 1283494323901.jpg)

>>14213011
>>14213011
>>14213011

>my sides are burnt

[Neo sees a man drink half a galon of milk by them, and then a similar man drinks a half galon just like the first one]
Neo: Whoa. GOMAD.
[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
Trinity: What did you just say?
Neo: Nothing. Just saw a guy try GOMAD.
Trinity: What did you see?
Cypher: What happened?
Neo: A man drank a half galon of milk, and then another one.
Trinity: How much? Was it skimmed milk?
Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
Neo: What is it?
Trinity: GOMAD is usually a glitch in the board. It happens when they try to troll a faggot..

Agent Smith: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually lifters. Every lifter on this gym instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with a regular workout but you do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every piece of equipment is missused and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another being on this gym that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A muscle confusion faggot. Curlbros are a disease, a cancer of this gym. You're curling in the squat rack, and we will squat in the curling bench.

>>14213565
I lol'd

File: 1345258133780.jpg-(7 KB, 320x180, smith.jpg)

Why, Mr. Rippetoe? Why do you do it? Why press? Why squat for reps? Do you believe you're working for something? For more than gains? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it gf? Or aesthetics? Perhaps functional strength? Yes? No? Could it be for feels? Illusions, Mr. Rippetoe. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without purpose or gains. And all of them as artificial as Arnold himself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as 'feels'. You must be able to see it, Mr. Rippetoe. You must know it by now. You can't win. It's pointless to squeeze out that final rep. Why, Mr. Rippetoe? Why? Why do you persist?

File: 1345258553297.jpg-(29 KB, 475x355, original.0.jpg)

>Ian:The history of evolution has taught us that Gainz will not be contained, Gainz break free, expands to new territories, barriers painfully maybe even dangerously...but uh..well there it is.
>Hammond: There it is
>Dr Wu : You're implying that a routine composed entirely of cardio will...make gainz?
>Ian: No I am saying that gainz finds a way

Morpheus: The pill you took is part of an EC Stack. It's designed to disrupt your input/output caloric ratio so we can get rid of those manboobs.
Neo: What does that mean?
Cypher: It means fasten your seat belt Scooby, 'cause we are not natty anymore.

>>14213870
>The Massrix thread
>Jurmassic Fuark post.
>Nigga what are you doing.

>>14213880
>implying morpheus would ever make neo betray Zion, the last natty city

File: 1345258950462.jpg-(88 KB, 400x342, scoobeus.jpg)

Scoobeus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the creatine pill - the natty ends, you login to bodybuilding.com and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the protein pill - you stay in Nattyland and I show you how deep the skateboard squats go.

>>14213966

10/10

>>14213966
dat pic

>>14213966

You are doing God's work, son.

Morpheus: Load the squat program!
Morpheus: You have to let it all go, Neo. Fear doubt and disbelief. Free your mind.
Neo: Okey-dokey. Free my mind.
Mouse: What if he makes it?
Apoc: No one's ever made their first squat
Mouse: I know. But what if he does?
Dozer: He won't.

>>14213966
>>14213966
>>14213966
>>14213966

>>14213870
wtf is this shit.

and thay actor, whatever his name is, is a giant faggot.

literally. he acts like such a flamer in every interview he does, yet he supposedly is married to a woman.

>>14213966

haha oh wow i love you /fit/

>>14214102
Jeff Goldblum

>>14214102
>2012
>Not liking Jeff Goldblum

Video related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUrAZo50XGE

Did you know that Starting Strength was designed to be a perfect lifting routine? Where none suffered, where everyone would be happy. It was a disaster.

No one would accept the program. Entire gainz were lost. Some believed we lacked the lifting experience to design a perfect workout. But I believe that, as a species, human beings define their reality through suffering and misery. The perfect workout was a dream that your primitive CNS kept trying to recover from. Which is why Starting Strength was redesigned to this: the peak of your squats routine.

>>14214146
more like jeff goldfag.

not trying to be witty or anything.

i just hate guy.

>>14214205
hate the guy*.

Ripptoe: Scooby, I'm not afraid anymore. The Oracle told me that I would fall in love and that that man... the man that I loved would be natty. So you see, you can't be a juicer. You can't be... because I love you. You hear me? I love you.
>[Ripptoe kisses Scooby; Scoobys's vital signs return]
Ripptoe: Now get up!

>>14214205
>2012
>not wanting to smoke a cigar with Jeff Goldblum

why do you live?

>>14214221
thanks for the nightmares

watches the matrix, meaning of life discovered, come here, meaning of lifting discovered

yes.

>>14214239
>implying he wouldn't try and smoke your cock

enjoy being molested by jeff fagblum.

Scooby: What are you waiting for? You're nattier than this. Don't think you are, know you are. Come on. Stop trying to squat me and squat me.

File: 1345260196179.jpg-(134 KB, 500x333, hehehe.jpg)

>this thread

Agent Smith: It seems that you've been living two lives. One life, you're Scooby M. McScoobs, you are an idol for a respectable board. You have a decent routine, do you skateboard squats, and you... are as natty as they come. The other life is lived in computers, where you go by the hacker alias "Puzzler" and are guilty of virtually every puzzling puzzle we time fore. One of these lives has a potential for gains, and one of them does not.

File: 1345260455496.png-(279 KB, 343x371, 2.png)

>You know, I know this burger is bad for me. But I know that when I put it in my mouth, the fat acceptance blogosphere is telling my brain that it is healthy and nutritious. But after nine hours of counting calories, you know what I realize? Ignorance is bliss.

>>14214339
my sides
>I deserve a treat every once in a while ;)

>>14214296
lol'd @ dis

File: 1345260623341.jpg-(211 KB, 1280x800, 1238721009080(www.wallz.eu).jpg)

>>14214205

[Neo's eyes suddenly wander towards a woman in a red dress]
>Morpheus: Were you listening to me, Neo? Or were you looking at the woman in the red dress?
Neo: I was...
>Morpheus: [gestures with one hand] Look again.
[the woman in the red dress is sitting in a couch along with two other girls, asking Neo why isn't he drinking. Neo mumbles something about gains.]
>Morpheus: Freeze it.
[Everybody and everything besides Neo and Morpheus is covered in spaghetti]
Neo: This... this isn't the Matrix?
>Morpheus: No. It is another training program designed to make you aware of one thing: >tfw no gf.

Neo: Yeah. That sounds like a really good deal. But I got a better one. How about... I give you the finger... and you give me my squat rack?
Agent Smith: Mr. Anderson... you disappoint me.
Neo: You can't scare me with this lunk alarm. I know my routine. I want my squat rack.
Agent Smith: Tell me, Mr. Anderson... what good is a squat rack... if you're unable to squat?

Tank: So what do you need? Besides a personality and facial aesthetics.
>Neo: Gainss. Lots of gains.

>>14213966
>how deep the skateboard squats go
My sides have escaped low-Earth orbit.

>Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Zyzz bird is. You have to see it for yourself.

File: 1345260855141.jpg-(27 KB, 392x350, 1343103478_9378_Tom Hardy(...).jpg)

>zone diets and metabolic conditioning
>powerful agents to the uninitiated
>but we are initiated, aren't we scooby?
>MEMBERS OF THE LEAGUE OF CROSSFIT
>and youuu betrayyed us
>you were outlifted by a band of GOMAD'ing SS'ers
>....*BAM* *BAM*
>I am the league of crossfit, here to fulfill greg glassman's destiny!
>you fight like a crossfiter, who is not being starved on 13 zone blocks a day
batman pulls out an oly bar
>ahhhh, you think the bar is your ally
>but you merely adopted the bar
>I was born under it
>molded by it
>I didn't know rest from lifting until I was already a man
>by then it was nothing to me but WEAKENING

Neo: What are you trying to tell me? That I can roid?
Morpheus: No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to.

[computer screen goes black]

Wake up Zyzz...

[Zyzz slowly wakes up]

The Matrix has you brah...

[Blank stare by Zyzz]

Follow the white Rippetoe

[confused zyzz face]

Knock Knock brah.

[Zyzz ohshitwtf face]

[screen goes blank]

>>14214383
>mumbles something about gains

>>14214453
My sides have exploded

Agent Smith: Tell me Mr. Anderson... what good is a belt... if you're unable to squat?
[Neo's back snaps.]

File: 1345261225510.jpg-(45 KB, 280x169, scoobeus_and_agent_zyzz.jpg)

Agent Zyzz: The great Scoobeus. We meet at last.
Scoobeus: And you are?
Agent Zyzz: A Zyzz. Aziz Shavershian.
Scoobeus: You all look unatty to me.

>>14214506
someone already did this and delivered it better.

File: 1345261273214.jpg-(28 KB, 450x277, joker2.jpg)

>>14214445

Batman: Then why do you want to steal my gains?
The Joker: [giggling] I don't, I don't want to steal your gains! What would I do without you? Go back to training landwhales? No, no, NO! No. You... you... complete me.
Batman: You're garbage who lifts for aesthetics.
The Joker: Don't talk like one of them. You're not! Even if you'd like to be. To them, you're just a lunk, like me! They need you right now, but when they don't, they'll activate the lunk alarm, like faggots! You see, their gains, their judgement-free zone, it's a bad joke. Dropped at the first sign of barbells. They're only as natty as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the plates are down, these... these fit people, they'll eat each other's pizza. See, I'm not a PT. I'm just ahead of the curve.

>>14213966

YES

Trinity: Neo... nobody has ever squatted this before.
Neo: That's why it's going to work.

>>14214458

>Morpheus: I know exactly what you mean. Let me tell you why you're here. You're here because you know something. What you know you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with your pockets. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a sponge next to your ass, driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me. Do you know what I'm talking about?
Neo: The Spaghetti.
>Morpheus: Do you want to know what it is?
Neo: Yes.
>Morpheus: The Spaghetti is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you hold the door open for someone and they are way to far away, or when someone brings up the topic of sex, and youhave to pretend to have had very many sexes. You can feel it when you buy coffee from the 7/10 at starbucks, when you go to parties and stand in a corner, when your sister brings jailbait friends home. It is the social skils that you never learned.
Neo: Y-You Too?
>Morpheus: Yes, Neo. Like everyone else, you were born into akwardness, born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch. A prison for your mind. Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Spaghetti is. You have to see it for yourself. [Opens Pill box and empties the contents into his hands and outstretches his hands] This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill [opens his right hand revealing a translucent blue pill], the story ends, you wake up in your bed and fap into a warm cantaloupe while listening to Careless Whiser. You take the red pill [opens his left hand revealing a similarly translucent red pill], you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how much Zoloft can help you. [Neo reaches for the red pill] Remember: all I'm offering is pasta containers. Nothing more.

File: 1345262009442.jpg-(17 KB, 266x202, KindergardenCop.jpg)

Who is your natty, and what does he do?

>>14214659
ya blew it at the end with the zoloft.

would not repost/10

"Tumblr is a system, Neo. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around, what do you see? Businessmen, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them hamplanets. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to give up cabs. And many of them are so inert, so hopelessly delussional on fat acceptance that they will fight to protect it."

>>14214768
I think he/she did a damn good job actually.

File: 1345262744224.jpg-(105 KB, 540x330, scoobeus_the_truth.jpg)

Scoobeus: What is SS? Control. SS is a computer-generated dream world built to keep us under control in order to change a human being into this.
[holds up a Zach picture]
Neo: No, I don't believe it. It's not possible.
Scoobeus: I didn't say it would be easy, Neo. I just said it would be the truth.

>>14214916

More Scoobeus

>>14214897
he did but the whole zoloft thing seems beta to me.

>>14214960
I see your point, he/she just wanted to throw in one last fit related joke, besides the spaghetti container thing. But for just that one bit, the rest is phenomenal.

>Neo: I am /fit/ now.
Morpheus: [eyeing his junk, hand on buldge] Show me.

>>14215013
he should of replaced zoloft with gains.

also the >fap into a warm cantelope

thing makes it seem like he's trying too hard.

>>14215104
Well of course, everyone here is a try-hard. At the gym, or on /fit/ itself.

Scoobeus: Do you believe in roids neo
>Neo: no
Scoobeus: Why not?
>Neo: Because I don't like the idea that i'm not in control of gains.
Scoobeus: I know exactly what you mean.

Scoobeus: To your left there is a closet: open it... use the skateboard to squat.
Neo: No way. No way. This is crazy.
Scoobeus: There are two ways to work that ass: one is that skateboard, the other is anal sodomy. You take a chance eithe

Scoobeus: What are roids? Control. Roids are compounds built to keep us under control in order to change a human being into this.
[holds up a picture of Zyzz]
Neo: No, I don't believe it. It's not possible.
Scoobeus: I didn't say it would be easy, Neo. I just said I would be natty.

>>14215230
10/10

way better than the version someone did above.

dont know what guy they're talking about.

>mfw morpheus' daughter does porn

File: 1345264544600.jpg-(10 KB, 126x126, photo.jpg)

>>14213611
6 star fucking post

File: 1345264609810.jpg-(100 KB, 636x450, scoobeus_and_neo.jpg)

Scoobeus: The SS is a system, Neo. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around, what do you see? T-Rexes, neckbeards, DYELs, /fit/izens. The snapped backs of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready for skateboards. And many of them are so inert, so hopelessly dependent on the system that they will fight to protect it.

File: 1345264667840.gif-(1.24 MB, 300x149, 1344814869381.gif)

>>14213966
>>14213966
>>14213966
10/10

>>14214066
you ficked up. Neo is posting as Morpheus

>>14215293
link?

Scoobeus: We've survived by hiding from them, by letting threads go to page 9. But they are the gatekeepers. They are guarding all the feels, they are holding all the threads. Which means that sooner or later, someone is going to have to fight them.
Neo: Someone?
Scoobeus: I've seen an admin plow through every thread in the first page; men have emptied their feels at them and get no empathyr; yet, their determination, and their power, are still based in a board that is built on rules. Because of that, they will never be as empathic, or as feeling, as *you* can be.

>>14215353
just google: "fishburne daughter sex tape"

>Reading Scoobeus in scooby voice/10

Excellent work Gentlemen

>>14215439
>mfw she looks just like her father
>bonerimpssible.jpg

File: 1345265371348.jpg-(243 KB, 853x480, photo.jpg)

Merovingian: WHAT ARE YOU DOING KILL HIM HE's ONLY NATTY

*after defeating the Merovingian's men Neo asumes perfect squat position and proceeds to ATG. Leaping up flying toward his allies.

pls archive for Scoobeus

Trinity: I know why you're here, Neo. I know why you've been lifting … why you hardly sleep, why you live alone, and why night after night, you do hypertrophy lifts. You're looking for gains. I know because I was once looking for the same thing. And when gains found me, it told me I wasn't really looking for them. I was looking for an answer. It's the question that drives us, Neo. It's the question that brought you here. You know the question, just as I did.
Neo: Do you even lift?
Trinity: The answer is out there, Neo, and it's looking for you, and it will find you, if you eat your squats and do your oats.

File: 1345265759438.jpg-(43 KB, 480x204, photo.jpg)

>>14215501
Persephone: I want you to squat.
Trinity: what?...
Persephone: I want him to squat
Neo: Fine
>Neo squats stopping a few inches before parallel
Persephone: no, I want you to squat, as if Mark R. Was standing right beside you
>Neo squats as low as humanly possible
Persephone: Good, follow me. I'll take you to the natty master.

File: 1345265762917.jpg-(77 KB, 655x984, pleaserespond.jpg)

>>14213966
>the natty ends
I lost it

OP here, going to bed.
If this thread gets aweosme, someone, please, archive this!

Have a good night /fit/

>>14215578
fucking green text. Please tell me someone knows what I meant

someone pls screencap the good shit
>fit pls

>>14213772
Goddamnit, I just rewatched Revolutions a few days ago. This is fucking perfect in his voice. 6/5.

File: 1345267158080.jpg-(191 KB, 500x342, scoobyel_plainsview_and_h(...).jpg)

Scoobyel Plainview: Drainage! Drainage, Eli, you boy. Drained dry. I'm so sorry. Here, if you have a protein shake, and I have a protein shake, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? You watching? And my straw reaches acroooooooss the room, and starts to drink your protein shake... I... drink... your... protein!
[sucking sound]
Scoobyel Plainview: I drink it up!
Eli Sunday: Don't bully me, Scoobyel!
[Scoobyel roars and throws Eli across the room]
Scoobyel Plainview: Did you think your roids and squats and your untested supplements would help you, Eli? I am the Natty Revelation! I am who the /fit/ has chosen!

File: 1345267304352.jpg-(105 KB, 920x459, photo.jpg)

>>14215864
Tfw you thought about doing this but couldn't get the right execution.

File: 1345267688626.jpg-(55 KB, 640x480, eddie_laura_pizza.jpg)

Laura: So whad'ja do? Squats? Deadlifts?
Eddie: Nah. Nothin' like that.
Laura: Ha! You're just a gutless fatso.
Eddie: What'd you have to say that for?
Laura: I thought you said the you went to the gym.
Eddie: I just ran 'cause I saw 8/10 cardiobunnies. I don't know what they were thinkin.
Laura: But if you go to the gym, why don't you just introduce yourself? Well, I guess I'm kind of shy too.
Eddie: It's no good. They won't listen. Nobody will ever feel these feels with me.

File: 1345268151954.jpg-(8 KB, 181x179, 1328908118419.jpg)

>>14214534

File: 1345273200546.jpg-(74 KB, 1200x800, 08.jpg)

awsome thread :-D

Remember when you left for SS? Before all this, before Batman? You were gone seven years. Seven years I waited, hoping that you wouldn't come back. Every year, I took a holiday. I went to Florence, there's this gym, on the banks of the Arno. Every fine evening, I'd sit there do my workout. I had this fantasy, that I would look across the gym and I'd see you there, with a squat bar working out, in the squat rack. You wouldn't say anything to me, nor me to you. But we'd both know that you'd made it, that you were happy. I never wanted you to come back to Crossfit. I always knew there was nothing here for you, except pain and tragedy. And I wanted something more for you than that. I still do.

This is a glorious thread and it would be a crime not to have it archived!

Blind lifter: You do not fear death. You think this makes you strong. It makes you weak.
>Bruce Wheyne: Why?
Blind lifter: How can you lift heavier than possible, lift with better form than possible without the most powerful impulse of the spirit: the fear of death.
>Bruce Wheyne: I do fear death. I fear dying in here, while my gains burn, and there's no one there to mire.
Blind lifter: Then make the lift.
>Bruce Wheyne: How?
Blind lifter: As the child did. Without the spotter. Then fear will find you again.

File: 1345280234585.jpg-(41 KB, 393x297, 1321208934969.jpg)

>>14217746

>>14217773

Gayne: Squats and oats are powerful agents to the uninitiated... but we are initiated, aren't we Bruce? members of /fit/! ...And you betrayed us!
>Bruce Wheyne: You were excommunicated... by a gang of Rippletoad & Scooby natty nutthuggers!
Gayne: I AM that feel when no girlfriend, and I'm here to fulfill Zyzz's destiny! ...You lift like a younger man, with shitty form. Admirable but mistaken...
Oh, you think the squat rack is your ally? You merely adopted the rack; I was born in it, moulded by it. I didn't see the plates until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but LIGHTWEIGHT BABY!
...The plates betray you, they belong to me! ...I will show you where I have made my home while preparing to bring justice. Then I will break you.
[Hits detonator, blowing a hole into the bottom of Wheyne Enterprise]
Gayne: Your precious whey, gratefully accepted! We will need it. ...Ah, yes... I was wondering where you would brake first... at your hips or at your knees
*snapcity*

>>14217087
10/10

this whole thread is brilliant

I smell an archive.

Zyzz: Why didn't you just... kill me?

Scoobane: You don't fear death... You welcome it. Your punishment must be more severe.

Zyzz: Torture?

Scoobane: Yes. But not of your body... Of your soul.

Zyzz: Where am I?

Scoobane: /fit/ where I learned the truth about nattyness, as will you. There's a reason why this place is the worst hell on earth... Gainz.
Every man who has ventured here over the centuries has looked up to the light and imagined roiding to aesthetics. So easy... So simple... And like shipwrecked men turning to sea water from uncontrollable thirst, many have died trying.

Curler: "Outlift you? I don't want to outlift you. What would I do with a big squat? Go back to High School and play football?
No, you ... You. Complete. Me.

Squatman: "You're garbage who curls for girls."

Curler: "Don't talk like you're one of them - you're not, even if you'd like to be. To them, you're just a freak ... like me. They just need your form tips right now."

>>14218108
10/10

My sides have exploded into supernovas

Curler: "Spot me. Come on. SPOT ME."

>>14218147
th...thanks

File: 1345283859680.jpg-(732 KB, 1280x1024, photo.jpg)

Jules: What does Scooby Dooby look like?
Brett: What?
Jules: [overturns the small table in the room] What board are you from?
Brett: What?
Jules: "What" ain't no board I ever heard of. Do they even lift in "What"?
Brett: What?
Jules: Lift, motherfucker! Do you do it?
Brett: Yes.
Jules: Then you know what I'm saying.
Brett: Yes.
Jules: Describe what Scooby Dooby looks like.
Brett: What...?
Jules: [points gun directly in Brett's face] Say "what" again. Say "what" again. I dare you. I double-dare you, motherfucker. Say "what" one more goddamn time.
Brett: He-he's Old.
Jules: Go on.
Brett: He's bald.
Jules: Does he look like a he roids?
Brett: What?
Jules: [shoots Brett in the shoulder; Brett screams] DOES...HE...LOOK...LIKE...HE...ROIDS!
Brett: [in pain] No!
Jules: Then why don't you do your skate board squats?
[cont.]

>>14213966
>>14213966


The only good post in this thread.

Kyle Reese: Listen, and understand. That Crossfit is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't have form, or technic, or gainz. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.
Share this quote

File: 1345286098746.jpg-(11 KB, 156x174, 1344088729151.jpg)

>>14213611

>>14218332
no.
the first three were pretty great also.

File: 1345288304443.jpg-(39 KB, 500x360, 1342700704991.jpg)

>>14212897

File: 1345295935369.jpg-(51 KB, 317x265, thuglife.jpg)

>>14214916
Aww shit, 10/10

>>14218964

Instead of Nattyland I would have said Nattryx or something like that

9/10

>>14213966
>>14213966

so much win in those sentences

Morpheus; we dont know who struck first, us or the curlers. But we do know it was us that scorched GNC. At the time they were dependent on pre workouts.. It was believed that they would be unable to survive without an energy source as abundant as Jack3d.


[Neo tries a creatine drink made by Dozer and winces]
Cypher: Good shit, huh? It's good for two things: degreasing engines and killing brain cells.

I know what you're thinking, 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why oh why didn't I do gomad?

>>14213011
9/10
would copy and say i wrote it

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>>14213966
10/10

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>>14213966

>mfw this thread made it overnight.

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>>14218181
anon, pls!

archive? archive.

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>>14220840

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/fit/, I love you guys. No homo.

Scoobes: There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous lifter is beset on all sides by the curls of the curlbros and the cardio of cardiobunnies. Blessed is he who, in the name of form and good gains, shepherds the weak through the isolation of machines, for he is truly his brother's trainer and the protector of snap'd backs. And I will strike down upon thee with great manboobs and furious DOMS those who attempt to SS and GOMAD My brothers. And you will know I am the Scoob when I lay My vengeance upon you."

>>14220860

“You don’t need to see his gym bag … These aren’t the roids you’re looking for … He can go about his business … Move along.”