ads

Sometimes I go off my cut and pretend I'm just bulking.

i fap while in the gym sauna

>>13644656

Go to the gym, try to live a healthy and active life.

>>13644671

Actually loled because of how well I know that feel.

I squat past parallel.

I ride bicycles for cardio, and because it's fun as shit.

I literally cannot stop sucking dicks.

>Take a shit and then wipe, smell the shit on the toilet paper.

I do elliptical for cardio.

>>13644748

i usually sniff my fingers after wiping

I try to sleep as long as possible, because I keep telling myself that every second I sleep longer the muscles will grow more.
Actually it's true, but those seconds don't make any difference.

>>13644656
I do this all the time

I squat real atg, like a foot past parallel which is much harder. keep parallel e-stating faggots.

I actively shun overweight people.

I don't hang out with any people that are overweight, and I plan to keep it that way.

>>13644708
>I ride bicycles for cardio
Wait, you think no one else does this?

If I'm walking barefoot on laminated floor, I have to go on my tippy toes. my whole life. gave me pretty decent calves though, considering i was a fat fuck walking like a ballerina

Whenever I'm at work and see a fineass female, I instantly see myself hitting it from the back with their asscheeks spreadout. I feel mad awkward once they start asking me for help and shit cus while I help them out, I still picture myself fucking them doggystyle. Something serious.

>>13644799
It was a tongue in cheek comment,
but yeah I wouldn't be surprised

Sometimes when I see a hot girl I imagine what life would be like if we were together. I do this shit way too often, even when I'm at home. I just lie down and think about some hot girl.

I'm pretty sure we all do this though, and someone's going to quote me and post the "are you fucking feeling me" picture, or the "FFFFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEL".

>>13644789
I have friends in the chub arena, but not morbidly obese. It makes me uncomfortable.

I'm afraid they might eat me, or I may inadvertently catch some fat.

Or maybe I'm just shallow. Either way, same here.

>>13644837

You're right, you are literally the first person to use a bicycle for exercise instead of transportation. You're a fucking genius. Jesus christ, you should write an ebook.

>in shower
>going to wash my butt
>50/50 mix of axe shower soap and vaseline
>lube up right index finger, sometimes left index finger to make it interesting
>slowly massage butthole in soft circular motion

>now I do not dip in, always, on purpose at least, strictly mostly for cleaning purposes

Sometimes I use my offhand to spread a cheek aside because I weight about 350 all bearmode though.

I know i'm not alone in this.

>>13644819
I do this too

>>13644789
Same

No fat people even come to our parties.

There was this one guy there that was an obvious roid freak, fucking 6'3 and like 270 of muscle. Dude did cocaine at the party.

Almost killed everyone.

>feels like taking a shit
>hold it

>>13644866
You okay, dude?

Sometimes I sleep so that I don't eat.

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When I feel like I need to shit I go sit on the edge of my seat or a table and then hold it, the pressure of the poop wanting to come out makes me feel nice. I don't know why, maybe it puts pressure or massages my prostate. It doesn't work if I hold my shit in normally, I have to sit on a hard somewhat square edge.
MFW I do it

>>13644819
Same

Sometimes when I stay at a hotel and pay cash I'll shit and piss in the bed and then leave. They don't check ID or anything at most of the places.

i imagine killing people on a regular basis
not even joking

>>13644867

i do this

When I'm getting out of the shower I get this weird feeling I'm about to be transported to Antarctica or some frozen land and I dry off as fast as possible so it won't be that bad when I get there

>>13645402
I do this too, sometimes I sing how im going to do it in my head with a nice tune or beat

I have to sometimes physically restrain myself from punching people in the face. I just get an urge to do it.

>>13645021
holy SHIT i thought i was weird when doing that, thank god im not the only one

>>13645580
I do this exact thing.

When I'm getting dressed I try to imagine how long each article of clothing would extend my time alive in the tundra.

>>13645580

When I do something socially awkward and cringe-worthy, I imagine myself blowing my head off with an imaginary pistol. Sometimes I'll even pantomime the action with violent sound effects. It's a great stress/autism reliever for me.

>>13645021
Sometimes I shit myself when I do this

i usually eat my boogers

>>13646592
>>13646592

I wont eat but attempt to gauge viscosity.

>do not wash boogery fingers before gym

I imagine how it would be to be a bum exterminator. Like batman but I just kill bums that wake my ass up at 5:30 by looking through our garbage for cans.

File: 1342562745184.png-(11 KB, 264x233, OO.png)

i like to imagine a telephone pole smashing into cars while driving.

one time i was imagining it impaling several parked cars and almost drove into a tim horton.
pic related, the face of the woman at the table closest to the window when i hit the brake and she saw me

sometimes I will meet a girl at a store or club and track her down online. then find her on facebook, download all the hot pictures from her albums and fap to them. after about a week the thrill wears off and I move on.

>>13646717
I also intensely internet stalk people I have met, not very good at it though.

>>13646592
enjoy your strong immune system
http://www.damninteresting.com/you-can-pick-your-doctor-and-you-can-pick-your-nose/

>>13644853
All the fucking time. beta as fuck

>>13646717
isnt that normal?

>>13644854
I think the fattest person I hang out wih on a regular basis is ~18% bf.

Everyone I know currently (with the exception of some random college friends & some chicks I've actively sought out), I met through work, the gym, or sports I play.

It's more like, I actively seek out active people, which means I tend to (strategically or otherwise) avoid people who are unattractive or overweight.

>>13644853
ive done this, and ive taken the risk of actually talking to the girl, shits cash... the hardest rep is talking to her but its worth it

>>13646676
It would probably be a lot like this: http://youtu.be/EbGJ7p6t6yE

>>13645580
When im in the shower with my eyes closed i have a fear of being transported to under-water somewhere.

>>13644831
I do this. I want to fuck them and show them my authority, I wish it was socially acceptable to rape multiple women on a regular basis...

I have severe OCD and when I don't take my medicine I'm literally too busy making sure everything around me is either perfectly straight or not touching anything else around it. I cannot force myself to stop and do anything else, and the only reason I started lifting is because it took away a lot of the anxiety.

tl;dr, no meds/lifting = basket case

>>13645500
>>13644867

samefag

>>13647171

sympathy, i have had OCD all my life minus occasional remission; feels bad when there is always something new to worry about, and it feels like a completely justified fear.

>tfw all the missed opportunities from fear

I sexually fantasize about chubby chicks quite often.

>>I give grandiose speeches in my car to myself about myself and how I've been doing meeting goals and such
>>I usually smoke dank before my workout and I have no plans to stop
>>Sometimes I think I have multiple personalities

>>13648046
>>13644755
>>13644748
>>13644656

But especially op, I've thought about this a lot and when having sex with the frozen people I get naked as well and move them to a neutral position. This is so when time restarts I can act just as surprised.

Sometimes I shower in the pitch black with the lights off.

I crouch down and pretend I'm in a SEA jungle during a tropical storm with warm heavy rain, standing post on a night patrol.

Its awesome when your eyes adjust slightly to the dark and your mind starts moving shadows around.

>>13649070
holy balls I'm doing that

>>13644789
Same.

>While driving, I imagine what happen if I crashed into [insert near object]
>I think to myself constantly.
>I always manipulate my body language to make people like me more

>>13648874
>no, I don't.

>>13644831
I imagine myself fucking attractive females all the time ass well.

>>13649070
Lol I'm gonna try this literally right now.

>>13649070
>SEA
south east asian?

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for the past 3 weeks i have had dreams every single night about my gf cheating on me

feels bad man

When I'm using the machines in the gym (especially the assisted dip one for some reason) I like to rub the crevice at the top of my ass until my hand smells of sweet onions and rub it all over the handlebars

>>13649979
Not saying this is the case, but I had the same shit and it turned out she was

I was freaked out by how somehow my dreams were telling me that shit.. it was crazy

I have an unneeded paranoia type thing of what I could do in a situation if someone came to kidnap or kill me. Whether I'm showering, shitting or watching TV, I always end up looking for potential offensive and defensive weapons in arms reach

>>13649979
I know that feel bro. It feels so real, worst way to wake up in the morning.

>>13650094
>not keeping a loaded gun within reach at all times

Shit nigga what are you doing?

>>13649070
I did this in my pool once when it was raining at night.
Shit was so cash.

>>13650116
Being English and having over restricted gun laws, that's what the fuck I'm doing. Other wise I'd be some kind of cross between CIA agent and paranoid schizophrenic with guns around the house

Fap exclusively to milf porn. Not that I think it's weird,actually I think it's the God-Tier of porn. Anything else is not quite as exciting.

>>13650033
probably because you were thinking in the back of your mind that she was but you were telling yourself to ignore the signs

>>13650157
>>13649070
The after parties for my prom were at this hotel on the beach.

After getting hammered drunk a bunch of us wandered over to the water. I somehow lost all of my clothes and wound up about 50-100yds out in the water. It was pitch black because the turtles were migrating and all the nearby lights had to be turned off.

I eventually swam back then soldier crawled another 200 yds down the shoreline undetected to my friend who was fucking some girl. I stole his clothes and he never figured it out.

Ninja as fuck.

Smoke a bowl look up in to the sky and wonder what I would be doing if the world was actually gonna end on Dec. 21, 2012..

>>13650202
>get naked
>play by yourself at the beach
>steal someone else's shit while they score with a girl

/fit/ in a nutshell

>>13644770
I know this feel. I'm sure a second makes at least a 0.001 difference

Standing OHP and weighted decline sit-ups, everyone else seems to do seated OHP and ab pull downs instead.

>>13644656
Holy shit. Get out of my head. I've been doing this shit since eighth grade.

>>13650202
>>13650234
Christ, my sides.

I lick my own precum.

>>13644681
good luck with your erotic asphyxiation goals of 2012

On the ride back home from a hard lift session I sometimes think about how cool it would've been to have zeezz as my gym brah and how i will never know that feel

bump

File: 1342578435443.png-(19 KB, 528x404, 1338689673003.png)

>after having used a machine i set the weight to the highest possible amount to fuck people off
>i like to creep up on my dog and to shock him. the longer and stealthier the way is the better
>before and after showering i like to mire myself for 15 minutes or more even though im DYEL
>i often have dry lips and like to pull the skin off but not that much that i bleed or anything fucked up like that though

>>13645991
OCD symptoms I get it too. Like you're scared your gonna punch a nearby baby in the face, so you tighten your muscles to control them? A doc told me that's OCD once. Or are we different?

>>13651196

is that face from John Carter? the dog?

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When I'm riding passenger in a car i weave I like weave my eyes in and out of these little fuckers. Also i click my jaw side to side as im doing it. THE FUCK

File: 1342579667805.png-(336 KB, 1230x832, 1331213647234.png)

>>13651427
nah man its a finnish meme

>>13651427
It is Spurdo

whenever i have a zit anywhere i pop it and smell the pus

i don't know how it got started

don't mind the smell at all, kind of like it actually

i imagine generating winds powerful enough to clear away the overcast the longer and faster i run

i read things and 80% of the time go over them backwards and try to keep it a straight line. i might do this a few times over with my eyes before i move on or realize i'm doing it

i follow the outlines of shapes with my eyes and read things backwards in my head, making sure to pronounce each letter properly backwards, instead of making new sounds after reversing the words.

sometimes i imagine myself in a music video, not playing an instrument but actually making a story around the song. usually involves me saving the girl i like

i place a pillow between my legs when i sleep at night. i like to think it's because it helps keep the spine in proper position since i have a herniated disk, but it's probably because i'm lonely

beat that, /fit/ ;_;

>>13651703
Tons of ppl sleep with pillows between their legs. I am not even shitting you. Like regular people.

>>13651494
same. i do it with telephone poles aswell. even the jaw clicking.

>>13644819
I do this too. Ever since child.

>>13648874
Me too.

>before workout I imagine how I was week/2weeks/3weeks ago just before working out

>Then I say "I gather you all feelings! Grant me the strength"

>Visualise enormous power coming to my body in form of golden light that empower and strenghtens my body.

>While working out trying to imagine that every exercise I do is a battle with foe, slashing them to pieces.

>At the last set of most strenous exercise I sometimes even pour a red tea at myself to imitate blood and induce a great pump.

>After workout I do 30s hot/ 30s ice cold water shower. When the pain is unbearable I imagine that muscles I used while working out will explode.

>then I just lie in bed and chill out to some peacefull music and say to myself that I won this battle and can finally die happily.

shit, there was a movie like that

except no one got mad at him

it's called "cashier" or "change back" or some shit, about a guy who can never sleep and ends up working grave shift at a grocery store

>>13651703
>>13651754
Parents got me a body pillow for some reason

Sleep with if between my legs every night

It's good so you don't bruise your legs if they're on top of each other for a few hours

I mostly imagine to fight against bears. Sometimes lions. I lose sometimes, too.

Or some daydream about an asteroid hitting earth.

>>13653885
Is that the one where he stops time, undresses them, paints them, and redresses them?

>you imagined saving your high school from a terrorist attack

i'm sure other OCD people do this, but if i turn on/off a light switch, and it doesn't feel right, i have to turn it back off/on and do it again until it feels right, takes several tries sometimes (but i can control it enough that i'm not standing there for 5 minutes doing it)

if i try to open a locked door and it gets part of the way until you get to the click when you realize it's locked, it makes my entire body uncomfortable until i can find an unlocked door handle to open

i need to count to 10 before i can start a set of anything, otherwise i'll never lift anything ever. i have to tell myself okay you can stand here not doing anything til you get to 10, but as soon as you hit 10 you're starting that first rep

when i'm driving a car i imagine driving off bridges or into a tree or something like that relatively often and sometimes really have to fight to not do that, though i don't think i've ever been that close

i like thinking about large quantities of people dying. I'd never actually kill anyone, but I find natural disasters/terrorist attacks like that and how people react to it absolutely fascinating. Sometimes I find myself almost pulling for the death toll to rise, even though I could never live with myself actually killing someone. If I could control stuff that happens I'd shoot a huge meteor at the Earth and have it kill most of the people, just to see how everyone reacts before/during, and how the survivors manage to make it, then rewind time to before it happened so everyone was actually okay.

when i was in about 3rd grade i went through a couple year phase where i could only yawn if i grabbed the little floppy part of my ear. weirdest thing, took me forever to grow out of that one

Want to be involved in the medical field for career(nurse preferably)
Seen about 20 surgery's up close as an observer.
Close friends mother is diagnosed with Breast Cancer
I promise to come by often and show support.
I don't because being close to somebody with cancer that knows me well freaks me the shit out.

I sometimes sit and imagine what it would be like if I was Superman, and what would he do in a given situation.

I've been doing this since I was 5.
[spoiler] I think I've made him proud. [/spoiler]

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>>13653899
Yup. Guilty of doing this.

>>13653942
ah lol'd.
I do this sometimes, too.

I think about how people will react to something BEFORE I say it, then occasionally choose not to.

seriously I don't think I've ever met anyone who actually thinks before they talk. There are so many things people do, random criticisms, small arguments, where if they just thought beforehand "What possible good could come from me saying this," they'd realize that, in fact, no good would come from it, and shut their traps.

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Sometimes when I read a simple text, or a book, my mind tends to wander off on its own. I suddenly think about all sorts of things, you know social relations and shit. All this happens as a part of my mind still looks at the text and tries to understand it, but I can never remember what i've been "reading".


This can go on for several pages.

I question my self whether or not I'm gay every day, when I've got free time I think about it.

I don't know why, I'm not attracted to men, I love women so no idea.

>>13654036

I get that if I'm reading something I don't care about. I've gone upwards of 10 pages before realizing I have absolutely no idea what I just read. I don't even know if I was looking at the text or just absent-mindedly flipping the pages.

Sometimes when I'm lonely I recreate conversations I've had in the past and change up a few words in it and mimic what the other person would say.

I told my psychologist about it and he said its a sign of dementia.

>>13644975
Same here.

File: 1342589791804.jpg-(51 KB, 317x265, 1332076284309.jpg)

>>13653942

I've made my own plans as for how I will escape my school if someone was to go full fucking postal.

(It doesn't involve saving anyone other than myself)

I often watch helmet-cam combat videos from Iraq or Afghanistan and they run through the desert for long time spans. I live in a desert so I kinda "act" like i'm doing the same and recording from a helmet-cam as they are and it motivates me.

When I lift its in this anger-fueled way where I think about being sexually abused and channel my feelings of wanting to kill myself into my lifts. Also dat feeling of wanting to be better than you ever were before, (stronger and all) implying that that will somehow changed what happened to you.

This is what drives me for every last rep, especially with BP and OHP.

>Is this healthy?

I always walk on the balls of my feet and try to be as quiet as possible. Sometimes I pretend like I'm a ninja. Sneaking up on people is fun for some reason. Except I keep doing it even if nobody is around.

>>13653899
I play bass in a band (but originally played drums and also guitar) and I do this whenever I hear a song I like. Every. Single. Time.

>do creatine Frank Yang style of the bar after chalking it up.

>>13654284

Oh god, I do this too. Pretty sure a lot of people do, if you consider shit like air-drum and air-guitar or singing in the shower.

I only listen to songs on Repeat 1. And I'll listen to it over and over again for days on end, then not listen to it for possibly a month or more.

I often take showers for hours at a time. I turn the lights off, the fan on to reduce steam, and I lie down in the bathtub with the warm water raining over me, but I tuck my head under the liner so I don't get water in my ears. I don't pretend I'm on patrol in a jungle or anything, I just chill. For hours.

I keep triscuits in my car at all times. And diet soda. Usually in the trunk.

I open like 50 porn tabs, click "play" on all the videos and let them load, but usually get so horny from looking at all that porn I dismiss choosing the one I want to fap to and just start fapping to the first one. I used to keep them all open to watch later but now I close them.

Also, for some reason, I feel sad tonight /fit/.

>>13654727

Wut

File: 1342593559610.jpg-(4 KB, 256x197, Bed.jpg)

I masturbate while humping my bed.

I can't cum with my hand for some reason.

>>13654955
By humping*

I only listen to songs on Repeat 1. And I'll listen to it over and over again for days on end, then not listen to it for possibly a month or more.

Holy WTF?! Are you me>
I thought I was the only wierdo who did this...

>>13655505

welcome to /fit/ newfriend enjoy your stay

>>13644656
>implying this isn't a common fetish in Japan

nigga, do you even waifu?

>>13655531
Thanks brah, been lurking for like 3 years now and barely started posting...
Just recently months ago found /fit/ and trying to get healthy/aesthetic.
Everyone says this place is shit, but I really truly feel it is an awesome place. Guess I am an optimist...

I sometimes have dreams I eat McDonald's or drink soda. Then I spend the rest of the dream feeling sad.

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it 'the terminator'. First I crouch down in the shower in the classic 'naked terminator traveling through time' pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

>>13653941
>>13653885

Cashback

>>13655630
lol

File: 1342597675110.jpg-(177 KB, 853x480, have you seen this SHIGGY(...).jpg)

>>13655630

>1995
>traveling back in time
>walking into a bar naked
>demanding a person's clothes and motorcycle
>physically assaulting pedestrians
>fleeing in pursuit of John Connor
>ensuring the survival of mankind

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olXilz8r4uU

>bonus: look at the body info as he scans people

File: 1342598236173.jpg-(47 KB, 290x272, 1332129699280.jpg)

>>13655748

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>>13655748

File: 1342609703609.jpg-(125 KB, 800x533, 1195223456652.jpg)

When I squat I imagine two of most ridiculously hot porn stars standing in front of me, teasing me that if I complete the lift I'll get to fuck them. I never fail.

Obviously >tfw no gf

>>13655748

>10/10

>>13657253
>two of the most hot pornstars
>Rachael Starr and Alexis Texas
both fatass/10

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>>13655748

>>13653899
This, I hate it.
It spreads into other shit too, watching a movie, I imagine I'm acting it out in front of people I know.
It's fucking annoying, I can't focus on the thing and just appreciate it for what it is I have to imagine I'm doing it, fuark

>>13653899
HAH yes.

Also, whenever I play Beethoven's moonlight sonata 3rd movement on the piano, I pretend like I'm in a big-ass concert hall impressing all the bitches

File: 1342612881466.jpg-(20 KB, 471x358, 1313184912801.jpg)

I used to hear "Eye of the Tiger" in my head so frequently while exercising that I have to imagine myself having very slow, sensual sex with every member of Survivor while looking them in the eyes.

It makes me feel so awkward I immediately stop hearing the song in my head. No other method has worked so far.

>>13649979
>>13649979

rofl that fucking cat

>>13657703
wat

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>>13644656

>When I'm at the gym or just out in general, I imagine stopping time and taking girls' clothes off.

You really, really need to watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fg_cwI1Xj4M

>>13644656
sometimes I wish OP won't be a faggot but then he disappoint me

>>13650234
You forgot the part where you then brag about it

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>>13653953
>i'm sure other OCD people do this, but if i turn on/off a light switch, and it doesn't feel right, i have to turn it back off/on and do it again until it feels right, takes several tries sometimes (but i can control it enough that i'm not standing there for 5 minutes doing it)

I have two lights that can be turned on/off from two switches. I have to set them so that when it's off (or on) the correct switch is up and the other one is down. Yes that means some extra walking back and forth, sometimes in the dark.

>>13644656
>>13644656
>>13644656

OP
You
>NEED
to watch the movie CASHBACK

It is about an insomniac kid that does EXACTLY this

hey /fit/ i need some help.
I'm 20 years old and have been balding very rapidly.
something has just came up in my life where i want to better myself and was wondering if anyone on /fit/ has had this problem and solutions to this.

>>13644656
i piss out my bedroom window when i'm tired

I create and manage stories in my head. Sometimes the story only takes a few days to finish, other times it can take months or even one time it took over a year. Currently my story entails a zombie apocolypse scenario where my 4 friends and I are trying to survive. Whenever I start to get bored I add a sudden plot twist, such as running into another group of humans. This story has been going for about 2 months and I can basically zone out and resume my story at a moments notice. Really useful when I am driving to work in the morning.

>>13659335
Dude I do that all the time when I'm bored while waiting, usually in bed before I fall asleep.

Right now in my current story I'm a vampire who's going around killing niggers and raiding blood donation clinics because I don't want to drink AIDs infected nigger blood.

>>13659335
i used to do that exact same thing when i was younger, but i've kind of lost the ability to keep the story going, or at least remember it all in my head.
feels bad, man

>>13644691

10/10

>>13644671
are you me?

>you imagined you and everyone you know had the ability to become animals, and lived in some sort of jungle interacting

>you imagined your school/workplace was some sort of fantasy realm split into many different kingdoms, with you as king of one.

>>13659288
>i piss out my bedroom window when i'm tired
One night I came home drunk, and pissed off my balcony (23rd floor out of 48).

There was a post in the elevator about no peeing off balconies the next day... I guess I hit someone.

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>>13644671
>Sometimes I go off my cut and pretend I'm just bulking.


>Just came back from an office lunch, ate 2 lbs of wings, fries, 3 pints.
>Fat bitch at work makes comments about "genetics" and how I can eat like that.
>I haven't had a cheat meal in 3 weeks, yet I don't say anything, I ignore her and we talk about the sports on the TV. She gets real made that I don't acknowledge her genetics argument.

I couldn't care less if you kill yourself by obesity.